Game of Thrones: Two Swords Review


**Warning: Full spoilers for the episode follow**


Well the wait is over. Was it worth it? We begin seeing Ice, Ned Stark’s sword being melted down and formed into two new blades, all while an orchestral version of Rains of Castamere/Opening Theme plays ominously in the background and Tywin Lannister watches. One of the blades is gifted to Jamie during a conversation with his father, that didn’t seem to go the way either of them wanted it to. Tyrion was sent to await the arrival of Doran Martell, Prince of Dorn to find out that he was not coming, and sent his brother Oberyn in his stead. This is where we meet Oberyn and Ellaria in a brothel going over the pickings. Before anything can happen the Rains of Castamere is heard being sung by some Lannister men, causing some distraction to Oberyn. He proves to be a challenge, putting a dagger through the wrist of one of them, before Tyrion comes in. We find that Oberyn hates the Lannisters and blames Tywin for ordering The Mountain to massacre his sister and her children during the rebellion.

Dany’s dragons are huge now! Major growth spurt, and they don’t seem to care much what Mother says either. We meet the newly cast Daario Naharis and Grey Worm gambling over who can hold their sword the longest. They prepare to march to Meereen. It is a long march with a gruesome sight of a dead slave child pointing out every mile-marker.


Sansa is miserable, Shae is miserable, Tyrion is well, miserable. We see Jamie’s new golden hand and find out that it seems he took too long to get back to King’s Landing, according to Cersei who says as such when he tries to advance.

Ygritte is in some troubles, or could be it seems according to Tormund. We meet Styr and the Thenn, finding out in the conversation that the Thenn’s happen to be cannibals. Jon Snow is back in Castle Black, telling his story to Maester Aemon, Thorne, and Janos Slynt. Only Aemon believes him, letting him go after telling them what had happened during his time with the Wildlings.

Arya is with The Hound still, and has to have the most interesting story in this episode, as they fall upon an inn and find Polliver, the guy who took Needle from her and killed Lommy. It’s quite obvious she doesn’t want to be with The Hound, but she has nothing left which can also be said about him. A fight breaks out and we get to see Arya exact her revenge on Polliver and get back Needle. I will be looking forward to this story line throughout the season.

A year is a long time to wait for a season premiere, but I believe it was worth it. Two Swords was a fantastic episode, getting us caught up with the events of last season, and introducing us to the new characters and story lines for the months to come. Here is a preview for next weeks episode “The Lion and the Rose”.

Growing up my mom always said that tv would rot my brain, and she was mostly correct. Growing up with shows like Knight Rider and the A-Team has left me with a longing for more campiness, which could be attributed to said rot. Not many people watch an old show like The Greatest American Hero and think to themselves "They should totally remake this", but I my friends are not one of them. I'm Mike by the way. I grew up in Mesa and other than having an awful taste in classic television, I also really dig movies, comics and gaming. Baseball is a big passion in my life as well. Follow me on twitter @polluxmike or facebook

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